Closing Time

This is my favorite time: when my neighboring citizens call it a night.

After a final meal, I look over my empty table and gaze into the blackness of the night. So many little lights and sparkling colors throughout the distance. Depending on what part of the city I'm in, I could be showered with the bland orange lighting of high pressure sodium street lamps.

The cold night air moves in and I take my first breath of cold humidity. Not that south Texas humidity that causes your naked body to stick to the leather. Every night I walk this city, embracing the mist.

As this day comes to an end, I fear what may happen when I close my eyes. What does the devil have in store for me next? Hell, I woke up this morning to a phone call telling me that my closest friend has now become my enemy. "Keep your friends close; keep your enemies closer." A phrase that can be found in Christianity and in the mob.

For every moment I rest, the enemy only grows stronger. It's foolish to pretend that there is no enemy. Everyday there is an evil working hard to destroy my American way of life. And then there's humanity. What challenges of this lost society will I have to deal with tomorrow? Will I have enough ammunition to take on the fight and be victorious in battle?

Loretta signals to me that it's time to close up. Waitresses don't get tipped enough.

Every night I walk this city, embracing the mist.

A Heart for Marriage

What a day... Oh my God, what a day.

My day kicked off with an amazing sermon at a church, with a pastor that knows how to preach. I felt convicted in a great way. Where is my heart at? What is my heart made of? What does my heart stand for? Do I have a darkend heart?

The morning moved on and I was immediately frightened. I went from feeling ready to be the next UFC Fighter (because real Christianity kicks ass) -then I felt really, really frightened. Some of my closest friends were in emotional pain. One of my friends was on the verge of suicide... being hours away, all I could do was pray that I'd see my friend again safely.

Then later in the afternoon, I had the honor of attending a 50th birthday party of a woman who had been married for 29 years. It was foreign to me to see such a large crowd of people, all from the same bloodline, come together to celebrate one person's birthday. I was the only one present at my dad's 50th birthday. Yet seeing so many loved ones gathered made me... emotional.

All went well. I enjoyed the food of this gorgeous Italian restaurant in Encinitas, sipping on my champagne, and ice water. It was hot today. With the pain in my back, and knowing I had a basketball game in the evening, I had a nice cold glass of Gentlemen Jack on the rocks to loosen my body pains that I still feel from my time in the Marines. Still, what a day of celebration and cheer. It was an honor being at this event.

Atlast, it came to toast to the birthday lady. The husband, a noble man of honor and dignity, had the loud crowd all raise a glass. We did end up toasting the event, and I admired this man's charisma. He then got on a knee before his beautiful queen and said something... I couldn't hear what he said...

...but I saw the expression on his wife's face.

She couldn't hold back the tears, and leaped out towards her king with a hug and a loving kiss. It stunned my heart. Tears poured from her eyes not because she was touched by the moment; tears poured from her eyes because the love she had for her husband was... eternal.

I cry just remembering her expression.

I have rarely had the blessing of seeing a man and a woman express such love for one another. I marvel how a couple who has been married for so long still have undying, earth shattering love for one another.


I thought of this morning's sermon again... what kind of heart do I have? Could I love my spouse like that? Do I have what it takes to show someone that kind of love?

If real l0ve is sacrifice, do I have it in my heart to make sacrifices? What am I willing to do to love someone like that?

House-sitting Prayers

Vista, CA- I'm housesitting tonight, in a really warm home, fading fast, all alone. What a long day it has been. I woke up this morning to the sad news of an young woman in Northern Iraq who got stoned and kicked to death. Horrible.

After a long day at work, one of my closest friends was emotionally torn from the injustice.

Injustice... so common in todays times. I guess there's always been injustice in this world. I can only wonder whether or not there are any true heroes left to battle the injustice we are surrounded with. Are there any heroes left?

I continue to walk around this beautiful home I house sit and notice thousands of pictures on the wall, of children, family, and friends. I wonder if I'll ever have a home of my own with similar pictures of my children, family, and friends as well. I hope that the injustices of this world don't delete my hopes of having such a dream.

That girl that got stoned to death had dreams. Will anyone fight for the hopes she lost? She was a child on someone's picture on someone's wall in someone's house.

Oh, God, I wish there was something more I could do to defeat the evil injustices than just sit here alone in this house.

It's quite in this warm house. It's quiet like the still before a storm.

"What are you waiting for? ...the signal!"

Batman Returns (1992)- My favorite scene actually isn't one with Michelle Pfeiffer's black, vinyl cat-suit. It's one of the early scenes...

After Gotham has gone chaotic, and before the Bat-signal shines into the sky, the director shows Bruce Wayne, played by comedian Michael Keaton, who could be remembered as one of the best actors to portray Batman, sitting alone in the dark at Wayne Manor.

The shot first shows the dark, quiet castle known as Wayne Manor. Next, you find Bruce Wayne sitting in his library thinking. It's unclear what he's thinking about, but it is obvious he isn't asleep. Next, the Bat-signal shines across the dark, stormy sky; the bat-lights outside Wayne Manor kick on, lighting up the dark library catching Bruce Wayne's attention.

Bruce Wayne leaves his deep thoughts, and stands towards the shine of the signal. Duty calls, and now Bruce Wayne must become Batman.

I believe this scene captures so much of what I go through in life. I lose a lot of sleep thinking... concentrating hard on what was, what is, and what is to come. Like Bruce Wayne, I sit alone in the dark, in silence, and alone. What am I thinking about?

I think about how it is unpleasant to stand up for what is right. I think about how much I am sacrificing in order to stand up to do the right thing. I spend my nights praying and asking God for guidance, concerned for those I love. Just as Batman believed fighting for Gotham, I feel that there is a calling for me to fight for America.

People don't like me. They'd rather believe the rumors they hear about me and make up their minds about who I am, rather than seeking me personally to ask for the truth. It's hard to tell my friends from my enemies. I sit alone in the dark, thinking... thinking... waiting... not looking forward to what God wants me to do.

But just as the Bat-signal shines across the dark sky, the calling God places on my heart kicks on, and I know it's time to stand up for what is right. I love my God, I love my country, and I love you. Sure, like Christ, I ask if these cups be passed to someone else....but I'm the one who is called upon. The Bat-signal is only for Batman. The call in my heart is only for me.

And though Christ will bring division in my life, I will stand towards the Light, fight for righteousness, and do the right thing.

What a day!

Glendora, CA- Well, what a day. I woke up this morning and lost my wallet. It had everything in it too. Now I have to close down all my accounts and reorder everything. Sheesh. Driver's License and SS Card too!

Thanks to God, I have friends who help me out and spotted me the cash I needed to go to work today. Now, I just need to figure out how to get home. Right now, I'm sitting in a parking lot reflecting on my day. That never goes well. I wish I had a million dollars. I'd take us all out to dinner tonight, and yes, we can get some appetizers.

The wind is cool, and there is a slight breeze. Plenty of bright lights and colorful signs that remind me that laser eye surgery was the best investment ever. All of my vision is in High Definition...like God now upgraded my life from DVD to BlueRay.

There's a HUGE motion picture mural of this AMC Movie Theatre located right in front of me. Marilyn Monroe poses her mouth as if she wants something.... but I don't care what that something is because I never was into Marilyn Monroe. I was always a Grace Kelly or Ann Margaret kind of guy.

After a day of being on the road, and checking my Facebook from WiFi McDonald's, it is exhausting to be alive in this day and age. Today, I learned a school in this country suspended students for wearing the American flag. I also learned that if you're a Christian who stands up for what is right, you'll be the only one standing. I also learned that Hwy 71 connects to Hwy 57!

But the last tid bit that I did learn, is that you can take cut hair and stuff it into womens' pantyhose, and then use that to soak up spilled oil in water. It's a scientific breakthrough. There's even talks that the manager, Angeli Prutz, of SportClips Carlsbad, is seeking to donate all the cut hair to this process as well. This could be a great solution to help clean up oil spells in our ocean: cut hair and pantyhose. For more on what the hell I'm talking about, check out Matter of Trust .org.

http://www.matteroftrust.org/

Well, try to get some sleep America. I'll stay up tonight making sure the enemy doesn't try to destroy our nation.