In Dreams

Temecula, CA- Ever since I was a small child, I often would have a dream about once a year, that would be unlike most of my other dreams. These dreams would be so vivid and amazing, that when I would wake up, I would be shocked that the events that took place were all just a dream.

Last night, I had one of these dreams. It felt so realistic. The events that took place seemed as alive as when I'm awake. Sure, I've had violent nightmares and dreams brought on by post-traumatic stress from combat, but these particular dreams I'm talking about would be pleasant. It's usually the violent dreams that are vivid and clear. But every now and then, like last night, I will have a pleasant dream that would be remarkable.

Well, it was so remarkable, that when I woke from it, I was devastated. My heart fell and I just laid there looking up at the ceiling. I was so emotionally crushed, I couldn't bring myself to move. I tried what most people try to do. I closed my eyes and hoped I'd resume the dream.

Today, leaving work, I was at a stop light and looked to my left. I saw an open field. The setting sun casted a beautiful glow on the amber waves of grain. The beautiful reflection reminded me of this dream I had last night.

The life I live is not easy. I am constantly at war and moving from battlefield to battlefield. (These days, I speak symbolically) Maybe sometimes when I have dreams like this, or see an image in the nature around me, it's really God giving me a break from these hard times.

Hopefully, later tonight, I can have another one of these grand, pleasant dreams, and escape this reality for just a moment.

"True, I talk of dreams,
Which are the children of an idle brain,
Begot of nothing but vain fantasy,..."

The Broken

Tonight, I'm on NetFlix and I'm watching the most BIZARRE movie ever. Yup, I'm watching a movie from my DroidX phone; awesome.

Well, I wanted to see an action movie that I've never seen before so I began searching the list of titles. I came across a movie starring actress Lena Headey. You might remember her from the movie 300.



She's very tall, healthy, and comes across the silver screen in a powerfully, gorgeous manner. So I decided to view this movie she's in. The movie is called, The Broken! ...ooooooh....

Yeah, sounded really cool and interesting... but it's not!
This movie is totally BIZARRE!




First of all, it starts off incredibly slow. After for what seemed like forever, a mirror in the dining room finally broke. While using a payphone, a girl that looks exactly like her drives by a Jeep Cherokee. She trips out because it's the same vehicle she drives and the driver looks exactly like her.



All this stuff is happening, nothing's really happening, I don't know what's happening, things are just happening. I'm daydreaming about work, fishing, and....oh, there is one thing happening in the entire movie. Lena Headey's character is walking around everywhere with high heels. You hear them clack through the whole movie.

CLACK, CLACK, CLACK, CLACK, CLACK, CLACK, CLACK, Nothing's happening, something about a birth defect with the heart, CLACK, CLACK, CLACK, CLACK, CLACK, CLACK, CLACK, she's walking here, walking there, maybe that's why she has such great legs: all the walking in this movie. CLACK, CLACK, CLACK, CLACK, CLACK, CLACK, what's going on? Another mirror broke!

Finally, most of the movies budget went into a scene where she crashes her Jeep Cherokee.

Then, you guest it... CLACK, CLACK, CLACK, where is she going, CLACK, CLACK, CLACK, nothing's happening.



She's naked in some scenes, but you don't see anything. She opens the mirror in the bathroom to grab some asprin, or something, I don't know, I wasn't really paying attention, but I assume she's going to close the mirror and the dead asian chick will be behind her, or in the reflection.

NOPE!!!!! She closes the mirror and NOTHING HAPPENS! Seriously? I'm surprised she's not naked with only her high heels on. No clacking in this scene, THANK GOD!



She's all cut up from the wreck. I keep waiting for her reflection to distort or bleed all over the place, but nothing happens. There's just a lot of great shots of her face and neck. Lena Headey has a great neck in all her movies... well, this is the second movie I've seen her in.



She has a pretty neck. I'm not crazy crazy about it but it is nice enough to notice. I'm surprised she's not in more movies. Ironically, she's in this one. Oh, I almost forgot...

CLACK, CLACK, CLACK, CLACK, CLACK, CLACK, CLACK, CLACK, CLACK, CLACK, CLACK, CLACK, CLACK, CLACK, ...yeah, she just went upstairs only to turn around and walk back down stairs. I wonder if In N Out is still open? Can you believe there's an In N Out right outside the fitness gym I work out at? Is that injustice, or what?



More mirrors are breaking; is it Friday yet? I thought it said this movie was an hour and a half... I feel like it's longer than the second Lord of the Rings movie.

She's a doctor in this movie. The director spends about four hours filming a spilled cup of coffee. She just stares at it. CLACK, CLACK, CLACK, CLACK, CLACK, CLACK, CLACK.



This movie is bizarre. I think all her friends are dying but no...her friends are not dying. It's actually really predictable and I CAN'T TURN IT OFF!

Oh, JOY she's in the subway, now! CLACK, CLACK, CLACK, CLACK, CLACK, CLACK, CLACK, CLACK, CLACK, CLACK, CLACK, CLACK, CLACK, CLACK. But the exit is locked, so she has to walk back to where she came from! You guessed it: CLACK, CLACK, CLACK, CLACK, CLACK, CLACK, CLACK,CLACK, CLACK, CLACK, CLACK, CLACK, CLACK, CLACK, CLACK, CLACK, CLACK, CLACK, CLACK, CLACK, CLACK, CLACK, CLACK, CLACK, CLACK, CLACK, CLACK, CLACK.



Finally, the ending wraps up with intensity. I actually think the end could save the movie.... no, it's predictable. What I predicted is EXACTLY what ends up happening. Dang, really?

This movie is so bizarre and horrible... it's actually not bad.



CLACK, CLACK, CLACK, CLACK, CLACK, CLACK!

God Keep Those I've Lost

The streets at night are lonely. The darkness is abundant with sorrow and the aftermath of pain. Life truly hurts. I can feel the pain in every cell in my body. I think my heart aches because it stopped beating.

I have made it a habit to fight every second of my life. When I fall to the ground, I don't waste my time dusting off the dirt. I get right back up and start swinging. God blessed me with two fists that I can use to take out demons, one right after an other. I feel the fatigue when the demon I have to fight is myself.

I live life in the fast line. It doesn't slow down one bit. But sometimes, things happen in our lives that make us realize that we are moving too fast. We go through life so fast that we take for granted the blessings God has given us. We assume that those we love will always be there. We often ignore the inevitable.

Sometimes, we have to face the reality of losing a loved one. Sadly, it isn't until they are gone that we regret not spending enough time with that person. Only God can give us a Promise that we can see those we've lost again.

What hurts is when the smallest and shortest memory you have with someone who is gone, is a memory that burns in your heart hotter than fire. Crying is only the tip of the ice burg.

I fight every day and night against demons who come after my soul. Those who love me fight by my side. It just hurts when the world takes someone you love, someone who has fought for you to live.