It's Not What You Know, It's Who You Know!

City of Vegas? More like the City of VISTA!- What a day! I went for a painful run first thing in the morning. Then, I went to the bank. The teller flirted with me hard only because I was depositing a few thousand in cash. Sorry, that dough is for a special girl, not you. LOL. I had lunch with a couple of funny cats. One was cute, the other was mad. But I guess we're all mad here. After that, I did a little bow and arrow training ( I shot a Styrofoam bear!). I relaxed by taking a dive into studying the Ante Nicene Church Fathers. I messed around at Michael's, and finally ended up with a bunch of people at Boomers! The day was just packed!

So I'm at Boomers, a place with arcade games, go-carts, and miniature golf courses, and it turns out that one of my friends knows how to work the system with tickets! Like in the Vegas movies with card counters, my friend knew how to beat the ticket machines with the timing of dropping a token. He was so well at this, the tickets were pouring out of the machine. Not exactly counting cards in a game of Black Jack, but wow... he had these machines on lock down!

I tried to play the ticket games but only scored maybe 4 to 12 tickets at a time. My friend walks up, studies the machine, and carefully times exactly when to drop the token. The tickets were flooding in mad! I'm just standing next to him watching him score again and again and again. I'm collecting so many tickets, all the little kids around me are all mad-dogging me. I'm like, "That's right.... Can I get a wheel barrel?"

Tickets were just piling up in my pockets. We were cleaning the place out! I was screaming, "Ladies, root beer floats are on me!" I kept thinking security was going to come after us, take us out to the alley, and Robert De Niro would ban us from this family fun center!

Instead, we cashed in all our tickets. Since we couldn't figure out where we'd put the lava lamp or inflatable mallet, we just used our tickets to buy A LOT of candy, a dinosaur, a few tops, and other pieces of crap. Good times!

Does Anyone See What I See?

"When a trout rising to a fly gets hooked on a line and finds himself unable to swim about freely, he begins with a fight which results in struggles and splashes and sometimes an escape. Often, of course, the situation is too tough for him.

In the same way the human being struggles with his environment and with the hooks that catch him. Sometimes he masters his difficulties; sometimes they are too much for him. His struggles are all that the world sees and it naturally misunderstands them. It is hard for a free fish to understand what is happening to a hooked one."

-Karl A. Menninger

Every night, multitudes of demons run after me, trying to slam hooks in between the bones of my ribcage. The intensity of the dark nights take a toll on my heart. It is unreal the level of spiritual warfare I engage in every day, multiplied by the oppositions that constantly cut my happiness in two. The pain I endure is indescribable, and I can't help but shed a tear.

I feel baptized by the cold rain that pours over my brow as I take a deep breath of clean, cold air. I wish someone could witness just one hour of what I see every night. Am I alone, left in the lost shadows, fighting evil all by myself?

I can rejoice because there is at least one other person who can witness the pain inflected upon me. I am thankful that Christ burns in my heart of my cold body. He is aware of the night and guides me through to the next hour. He hears me crying, screaming toward the heavens...and His love rests my soul.

In Dreams

Temecula, CA- Ever since I was a small child, I often would have a dream about once a year, that would be unlike most of my other dreams. These dreams would be so vivid and amazing, that when I would wake up, I would be shocked that the events that took place were all just a dream.

Last night, I had one of these dreams. It felt so realistic. The events that took place seemed as alive as when I'm awake. Sure, I've had violent nightmares and dreams brought on by post-traumatic stress from combat, but these particular dreams I'm talking about would be pleasant. It's usually the violent dreams that are vivid and clear. But every now and then, like last night, I will have a pleasant dream that would be remarkable.

Well, it was so remarkable, that when I woke from it, I was devastated. My heart fell and I just laid there looking up at the ceiling. I was so emotionally crushed, I couldn't bring myself to move. I tried what most people try to do. I closed my eyes and hoped I'd resume the dream.

Today, leaving work, I was at a stop light and looked to my left. I saw an open field. The setting sun casted a beautiful glow on the amber waves of grain. The beautiful reflection reminded me of this dream I had last night.

The life I live is not easy. I am constantly at war and moving from battlefield to battlefield. (These days, I speak symbolically) Maybe sometimes when I have dreams like this, or see an image in the nature around me, it's really God giving me a break from these hard times.

Hopefully, later tonight, I can have another one of these grand, pleasant dreams, and escape this reality for just a moment.

"True, I talk of dreams,
Which are the children of an idle brain,
Begot of nothing but vain fantasy,..."